Have you ever wondered why some people are super motivated and others aren’t? Or why some people just seem so confident and happy, while you’re not?
The truth is, it all comes down to mindset and your mindset has the power to make or break your success in anything. That’s why we need to work on it daily, be aware of our self-talk, and guard it like it’s a million dollars.
I remember in high school, I always felt like the ugly duckling. I didn’t really feel like I fit in and I was constantly feeling insecure about my body, my hair, and how I walked. I was constantly torturing myself with fear-based thoughts, like “What are they thinking of me?” “Are they judging me?” “Is my stomach hanging out?” “Am I doing that weird walk again?”
Not just that, but I constantly told myself I wasn’t good by saying: “I’ll never look like her, I should just stop trying.” “Nobody will ever love me.” “I’m just too fat.” “Why can’t I just look like her; she’s pretty and people like her?!” “I’ll never be good enough.” “If this is all there is in life, what’s the point?”
Maybe you’ve experienced those thoughts as well or maybe your self-torture thinking looks a little different; either way, we need to stop. Let’s be allergic to self-criticism and self-bullying in 2019; let’s rise together and make it against our rules. When you catch yourself criticizing yourself, say “Nope, I’m not drinking that kool-aid anymore.” “Nope, I deserve better than that kind of thinking.” “Nope, that’s the old me thinking. The new me knows I can overcome this.”
I struggled with self-bullying most of my life and it finally took me throwing down the gauntlet and saying that isn’t acceptable anymore. Here are the 3 mindset detoxes I had to adopt to move out of that self-torture cycle and into a life full of opportunity:
Self-Comparison. I know how easy it is to compare yourself to others; I did this for as long as I can remember! But here’s the thing, nobody is perfect and it’s time we stop idolizing people based on their highlight reel! You have your own story and they have theirs; you can do just as much if not more than they can. Will it be exactly like them? No, but that’s the amazing part; we all have a purpose and our story is a part of that. Embrace it, accept it, and use it!
Worrying what others think. Let go of worrying about what others think about you, your looks, your body, your work, your religion, your beliefs, etc. You don’t really know what they’re thinking anyway and it’s definitely not serving you! What you’re really doing is putting your insecurities into their mouth. It’s time to stop it! Plus, they could be thinking how much they love your shirt, not how big your stomach is. So, let that worry go because there is so much freedom when it’s gone.
Self-Bullying. This includes criticizing yourself when you look in the mirror, judging yourself, speaking negative rude remarks (example “way to go Ranell” after I spilled my coffee, or “wow you always f it up don’t you.”), and constantly pointing out what’s not perfect about you. A good rule of thumb is if you won’t say that to your best friend or your child, then you don’t need to say it to yourself.
If you would like some extra help in detoxing your mindset, I’ll give you $10 off my signature Thought Detox program, Break Free. Your mindset is SUPER powerful and it’s time we start embracing the power it can have over our lives when we control our thoughts.
I can’t wait to see what 2019 brings you! Go check out Break Free now and start detoxing your mindset! Here’s the coupon to get Break Free for just $37: BREAKFREE10